I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize