I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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