yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize
