OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize