ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize
