Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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