it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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