Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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