STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
My liver just broke up with me...
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize
