I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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