How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
