I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
