i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
The air was thick with penises
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Randomize
