yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
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