In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
It's rum buckets o'clock
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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