what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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