I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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