Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
