hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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