smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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