Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I just want to make out with him forever
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize