I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
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