Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
i drank out of a bidet.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
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