so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
