We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Randomize