i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
