so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
