i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
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