So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
