No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize