Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
