yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
