I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize