Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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