Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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