The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
i was born a porn star she said
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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