I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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