So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
