and she was petting her beer can
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize