this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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