Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹ï¸
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