who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I just saw a hot homeless man
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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