I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
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