Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
