he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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