He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
