I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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