i just wanna soil my oats bro
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
