i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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