Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize