Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Randomize
